What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Randomize