yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
