i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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