So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
