we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
