break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize
