Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
