This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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