So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
