Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Randomize
