We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I'm jealous of your bromance
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
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