dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
did you just send me my own nude
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
