Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Randomize
