His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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