We should be called the Road Head Warriors
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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