Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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