just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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