this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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