I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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