Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
