he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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