How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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