Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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