First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Randomize
