my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I made him laugh his dick is mine
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
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