you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Randomize
