I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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