wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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