HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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