Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize