Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
