508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
You can't motorboat a personality
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Just high enough for therapy.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
