just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
