are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
