this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Randomize
