i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
