I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Randomize
