He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
