Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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