So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
