I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
There r osticjed everywhere
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize