She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Randomize
