when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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