why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Randomize
