Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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