fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
