Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
