they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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