just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
