I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
