whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
BRING THE BAGELS
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I need to align my fucking chakras
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
